MUCH...

Much has happened since I've updated this blog and for now it cannot all be contained here. The thought of MUCH as a general principle is very much on my mind as of late.  Time changes so many things- kids grow/change, relationships grow/change, life presents challenges and joys. Heartache and devastation, Happiness and contentment- for better or worse everything changes with time.

In the scriptures we learn that time is fleeting and doesn't stay ('it came to pass...') we must live and love with our whole energies of spirit every hour of every day to make the most of this small window of mortality we are each individually granted. I am regularly amazed at how much one moment/action/choice can alter the entire outcome of our lives for better or for worse. I am astounded how much a person can have. I am amazed at the goodness of a loving Heavenly Father. I have learned we can't change others, only ourselves and pray for the rest- in faith, that things will work out- realizing the Lord has a plan and is mindful of our needs. I love the quote by President Hinckley about looking him self in the mirror and saying something to the extent of "it will be okay, it will all work out." I am grateful for how much we can learn from our living prophets and apostles and how the  Lord Guides them to lead us give the counsel we very much need to hear.

 I feel very blessed. We have been given so much. I'm grateful for the opportunities that change us and help us to grow. I'm grateful for the much love I feel for and from our families and friends. I ever grateful for the many joys motherhood has supplied me through the years. I'm grateful the Lord saw fit to bless us with 4 beautiful spirits that are filled with so much love and wise beyond their years. I pray everyday that I may be the mother they deserve. I pray that they will be strong and always trust in the Lord, especially when life feels hard. I pray that they will be able to feel how much we love them no matter what obstacles life throws our way. I should very much like to protect them- guard them from the harshness and pain of reality- keep them safe, young, innocent and confident. That would do much to calm my soul.

There is so much that is beyond our control- even when you feel you have done everything right- everything you're supposed to do to ensure a safe happy life for them. Everything the Father asks. There is so much that changes and so much we can't foresee- despite our faith and best efforts. The adversary is a very strong force and skillful at detecting our short comes, we must do much to ever be wary of his ever lingering presence and watchful eye.

 I'm sorry my babies. Everyday I pray that you may be spared much. Mortality is so hard. So much to learn so young. So much to endure so early. So many decisions, choices- pleasures and pain.   So much left undone. So much affected, so much changed. It can feel like Too much sometimes... which is why I'm so very grateful I've already been entrusted with and love you so much.